Prompts to Untangle Core Beliefs
We all carry certain stories and scripts in our head: whether they are core beliefs about how the world works, who we are and what we can expect from other people. Some of these stories were explicitly told to us by our parents (“you can’t trust other people,” “women should behave like X,” “Men don’t cry,” etc…) Others are transmitted implicitly by how we see our parents, role models and the adults in our world behave. Either way, these scripts, stories and assumptions effect the lens we view the world with.
To find out the power of scripts and assumptions in your life you need to break them down.
What are you assuming as truths?
Whose voice are they coming from?
Which script are you following?
Do you want to create your own script?
How can you create your own script?
What stories are we prone to tell?
Our stories are the lens that we view the world with. When we take the chance to retell old stories and to reflect on those stories that we have been telling ourselves, we have a chance to change our perception of reality. Code data in a new way.
How did our family approach love? Touch? Conflict? Beliefs?
Our family of origin is our first classroom where we learned to love and be loved.
Can you bring awareness to those stories? Can you name the stories?
Self Expression:
Expression is how we react in the world. It is what happens after we have an experience (stimulus), we have a thought and we consider our old stories, we have a feeling about the situation and the way we code it, AND THEN we have a choice. Our response is our choice.
Why does a stimulus so often create an automatic response?
Can you choose not to go with the knee jerk response? Consider these questions:
Why was I stirred in this way?
Why did I feel that response?
What is that emotional stir about?
Can you see things as a learning experience? Can you try to notice your assumptions and where they come from?
What is the story driving the assumptions? What are you telling yourself? What is the inner conversation?
Are there unnamed generational patterns at play?
What were your parents’ hopes and dreams? How or did they share them? Gender messages/stories? Messages about sex, money, and religion?
Expectations? How were you allowed to show up? What was valued?
How did the patterns move through your family systems?(Implicit or explicit). How do they become internalized?
Check out these useful blogs:
Tools for Dealing with Knee-Jerk Reactions,
Battling Negative Automatic Thoughts,
More on Negative Automatic Thoughts,
Are you interested in working on your personal development? Are you looking for a life coach or a life consultant? Are you feeling stagnant? Do you want to jumpstart change?
My transformational approach is a process where awareness, alignment, and action work together as catalysts to create momentum for change.
*Awareness is knowing what you genuinely want and need.
*Alignment is the symmetry between our values and our actions. It means our inner and outer worlds match.
*Action is when you are conscious that what you say, do and think are in harmony with your values.
Together we build an understanding of what you want to accomplish, and delve deeply into building awareness around any thoughts and assumptions that you may already have. To truly transform your life, I will empower you to rethink what’s possible for you.
__
Learn more about my approach to life consulting and relationship coaching here or get in touch for your free 30-minute consultation here! Don’t forget to follow along @LilyManne on social for more regular updates!
